Oprah's 2-Piece...

Everybody's feeling the recession in one way or another, so on Tuesday Oprah decided to post a downloadable coupon on her site for...(wait for it)...(wait for it)...Free Chicken!!!

The coupon, which was available for download for a limited time, is good for a 2-piece grilled chicken meal from KFC and expires after May 19th.

So what's the problem?

Well for starters her site was so overwhelmed with visits and downloads that many chicken lovers were unable to download their free ticket to the savory salvation of 12 herbs and spices. Then of course there were quite a few KFCs that weren't honoring the coupons or had simply stopped honoring them at a certain point. All of this lead to over 5700 comments being posted on Oprah's "free chicken page", from both happy and politely unhappy chicken lovers. There have even been reports of "sit-ins" at certain KFC's that aren't honoring the coupon. I would call bullshit on these reported "sit-ins", but after the recent Popeye's promotion it's not unbelievable.

Btw, did you know that Oprah received the “Person of the Year” award from PETA last year?

That's funny because KFC sources its chicken from Tyson, which uses controlled animal feeding operations which are dark and tightly-packed coops where the chickens are often unable to stand up or move. She even did a special last year on the hazards of factory farming which is still up on her site.

Good lookin' Harpo.

Question: Am I missing something? WTF is going on with all of these chicken giveaways/promotions?

Throwback: Jeff Redd - You Called & Told Me...

If you don't recognize the name Jeff Redd or this song I'm not surprised. This song was actually off of the soundtrack for the movie Strickly Business. It came out in 1991 and it starred Halle Berry's fine ass, Joseph C. Phillips (he played Denise's husband Martin on The Cosby Show)...

...Tommy Davidson (from In Living Color), Samuel L. Jackson, Joe Torry, it even had Jodeci in it....well anyway this was the song they played during all of the club scenes and at the end of the movie.

Jeff Redd - You Called & Told Me

I swear I love this song, this shit makes me want to throw on a silk polka dot button up shirt, a pair of Cross Colour jeans, grow a hi-top fade and do the Tom & Jerry (note: if you're under 25 you probably don't know what the hell I'm talking about...it's okay. Cherish your youth). This song epitomizes that early 90's new jack swing sound. This was a time when people went to parties to party, when doing a dance routine in the middle of the club was considered cool and unfortunately, it was okay for people to wear colored jeans (like royal blue, red, green & yellow).

Nowadays parties are more "Top Model" than "Soul Train", dance routines are reserved for the extremely intoxicated (or that one dude who seems like he was cryogenically frozen in 1989 and just thawed out before the party) and if you see any adult wearing colored jeans it's a safe bet they're homeless, a crackhead or both.

Terrible quality, but you'll get over it...


Oh yeah, ladies if you're a fan of Mary J. Blige, you can thank Jeff Redd for her discovery. A lot of people think that Mr. MAC Lip Gloss, Puffy, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy discovered her. While he did help develop her as an artist during the earlier stages of her career, it was Jeff Redd that helped her get signed to Uptown. Mary's stepfather gave Redd (who was an A&R as well as an artist at Uptown) a demo tape of Mary performing Anita Baker's "Caught Up in the Rapture." After hearing the tape he sent it to Andre Harrell...and well you know the rest.

R.I.P. Swagger, Swagga & Swag...

There you have it. The word swagger and all of its variations are officially dead. It has been for a long time, but now it's official because mainstream White America has begun to use it. Don't worry it's in a better place now...it's moved on to that urban slang paradise in the sky, where it can keep "Bling" company.

Now a message to the two groups who contributed to its death...

Rappers
Now you can stop using it in every other bar. Listen, you really don't have to try so hard to convey the idea that you're cool. Try taking it back to the basics, remember LL's "I'm Bad"? Short, sweet and simple...and he got his point across (shit, he was so "bad" he even had police lookin' for him...at least in the song & video). But noooo, we've had to endure lines like...

"Swagga on a hundred-thousand-trillion..."-Kanye
Oh why stop there...why not a Fafillion?

"I own the swag supermarket and you, you're just a bag boy / me I got that swag boy..."-Lil' Wayne
This has to be the worst...talk about creativity. He might as well had said "I'm the CEO of The 'Cool ' Company and um you, you just work in the mail room"....Ha! That's tellin' em'.

"I hopped up out the bed and turned my swag on...."-Soulja Boy
Apparently, it has an "on" and "off" switch. He should've turned them damn album sales "on" first...considering how his shit flopped.

"I'm Swag, I'm Surfin', I'm Swag, I'm Surfin', I'm Swag, I'm Surfin, I'm clean like this detergent..."-Fast Life Yungstaz
Huh? So you are swag? You're just pure unrefined swag? And you're surfing? This chorus is possibly the strongest piece of evidence that kids should stay in school.

"Her booty got swag, now dip it down den roll wit it..."-Soulja Boy
So anyone want to explain to me how this is possible...are individual body parts capable of possessing swag?


Promoters
You're the worst. You should be charged with 1st degree murder the way you used poor, defenseless, little "swagger" to death. You spent countless hours coming up with creative and mind blowing names for your weekly parties. Names like...

Swagga Saturdays

Turn My Swag On Mondays

Swagga Like Us Fridays

Soul Swag Sundays

Young, Prestigious, Sophisticated, Professional, Grown & Sexy With Swagger, Exclusive Thursdays

Stop. Just stop. We get it. Nobody with an ounce of common sense looks at your flyer and/or email and goes...

"Dammmn!! I gotta go to this....they used the most popular urban terminology along with 5 other adjectives to describe their party!! It's definitely going to be hot!!"

Well "swagger" you had your run, you over-saturated party flyers and rap verses for quite some time. Your place will be forever cemented in pop culture history. But like most words that have been abruptly adopted by urban culture and turned into standard slang, your time has come to an end. All in all, we had fun....but you won't be missed. R.I.P.

New Slum Village, Lil' Wayne, Fly Union, The Clipse...

Slum Village Ft. Marsha Ambrosius - Cloud 9
This is a breath of fresh air...I missed these guys.

Lil' Wayne - Fix My Hat
Supposedly off of Rebirth...and here we go again.

Fly Union - Fat Gold Chain (On Credit) via Scholar Report
Finally...some honest rap.

The Clipse Ft. Kanye & Bun B - Kinda Like A Big Deal Remix
They still got it 4 cheap. Their manager is facing an 82 count indictment....for running a $10 million drug ring. Full story here.

Follow Me...

Okay, I've come to the conclusion that my life is so fuckin' awesome that you might want to know what it is that I'm doing and/or thinking any at any given moment. So I decided to join Twitter. I've been on for a while now and I really don't tweet that much, but that's about to change (I think ...okay probably not).

Well at the very least, I'll keep you up to date with what's being posted on the site.

WARNING

Before you decide to follow me, I have to let you know that I'm a wild guy...I live life on the edge. I'm talkin' straight thug life felony shit, like....I don't even pay parking meters or tickets, I open and eat food while grocery shopping, I press the "close door" button on elevators when I see people running to catch it, I litter (because I think it creates jobs), I tear the tags off of pillows (the ones that say it's illegal to do so) before I buy 'em, I drive slow as hell when I see the person behind me is in a hurry, I even wear mismatch socks to work. Basically I'm America's worst nightmare....

So Follow Me....and play my gangsta ass Twitter theme music ....in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.